changing your story

Storytime

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When we were children we immersed ourselves in stories. We were read stories by our parents, we read books on our own and we lived out our fantasy stories all day long as we played.

I have a story for you. Growing up, I was fortunate to have my grandparents living with us in our home. My parents built a large home before I was born with several acres of land which had a lot of beautiful trees on it. They still live there and it is beautiful. My grandparents (my dad’s parents) came to live with us and stay in our basement which was turned into a large apartment space for them. It was amazing to see them every day and share our lives with them.

I remember vividly when I was about preschool age on the days I didn’t go to school or in the afternoons my grandpa would ask me “Queenie (his nickname for me) what will you do in your realm today?” I remember looking out with him onto the beautiful hills in the distance and really feeling that story to be true, that I had a whole realm to explore in every day. I would live in my own stories back then, playing for hours on end in the forest areas and around the yard of the house, sometimes with my dolls in tow. The world was completely open to me, it was all mine to be free in, to be happy in. There was freedom, peace and joy in each day and each day meant a new exploration in my realm.

Somehow, when we start to get older, we feel that we no longer can tell our own stories, that our stories are now set out for us by others, or by our circumstances or things that happen to us in life. Instead of being the leader in our own stories like we were as children, we become the victim in our own stories. We begin to tell negative stories about how we are, what we can and can’t do and why things won’t work out for us. At what point does this happen? How can we get back to our core selves that we once were?

I have always been a sunny optimist, that is my core self, however some of that got lost along the way and I am reclaiming it. I do not blame anyone for the loss of some of it, because it was always up to me to reclaim that joyful wonder that I had as a child. I have always felt it somewhere, but I am feeling it much more now. I do believe it is just an awareness that has come over me all of the sudden, like a sprinkle of magical sparkles. The wonder of each moment is coming back and I am reclaiming what was always there and never lost.

I have been writing my own new stories for the past few weeks. I usually write these stories in the morning while I sit in my beautiful backyard garden. It is such a peaceful and beautiful space for me to write in. This morning after I wrote one of my stories I saw a beautiful yellow finch. I think that was the universe saying to me “Great job on your stories, you are finding your spark again.” I felt that the bird was bringing me back to my realm of magic and wonder. Thank you yellow finch!

A story exercise that I invite you to do is this one:

Write a paragraph about last week. Pretend that 3 great things happened that you have been intending to happen. Throw in one great thing that did happen last week. This will start training your brain to think that those things really did happen. You will see the great effects of this!

Please feel free to comment on your experience with past and present stories!

Joyful Minimalism: 

If you are ready to explore your things but need  support and would like to work with me one on one, feel free to reach out to me by email and I can send you a client survey and set up a call with you. I can work with local clients and long distance clients. 

I have 3 home clearing packages to choose from: 

Services:

http://expansive.me/services



The Path to Joy

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The photo of the path above reminds me of the many paths we would go down growing up. We were so blessed to have lived out in the country with lots of areas to roam around in. Along the path we would often need to clear away branches or most often brambles or blackberry vines. That’s what I loved about those days of wandering through the forest. There was always something new to see, to discover and along the way you would gently clear away anything in your way. I know that this is a key to our lives as we go along the path to joy. The path is not laid out in front of you perfectly, there are obstacles to clear away, but just as in this photo, there are always bits of light, bits of joy peaking through.

This is the reason why I am creating materials for a program that I call The Path to Joy. I will run this program through Patreon with materials, workbooks, videos and more on a regular basis that you can subscribe to. If you would like to hear more, you can sign up to get updates on what is available to help you navigate your path to joy here:

https://mailchi.mp/106f620d5b5c/thejoyfulpath

I am so excited to work on creating this program. Many of the materials will be out by mid-late January, 2019. I look forward to personally helping you clear your path to joy in many ways!

With lots of love,

Trista

Become an Explorer

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“When you do not seek or need external approval, you are at your most powerful.” Carolyn Myss- Sacred Contracts: Awakening Your Divine Potential

The quote from Carolyn Myss above really grabbed my attention as I was reading her book yesterday about finding your own sacred contract with the world. I felt as if those words really leapt off the page because I feel as if the two big events that happened in my life this year: the closure of the meal platform Josephine.com and the closure of the coffee shop were really trying to grab my attention in a major way and were there to teach me some really profound and important lessons about my life.

The Traditional Path VS. Your Personal Path:

I used to think that there was a certain progression in careers or callings in which you needed to follow a specific path or ladder upward in order to appear and feel successful. To me, that was running/owning my own cafe, bakery or restaurant. As I have gone along my path I don’t feel as if anyone but myself has pressured me to pursue these traditional avenues. I feel as if the external approval I was seeking was actually coming from myself. I have always put lots of pressure on myself to achieve. When I took the strengths-finder test I found that one of my highest scores was in the “achiever” category. I have always been very driven to study hard, work hard, set goals and get wherever I felt I needed to go to be successful. I don’t believe anymore that because I haven’t achieved this goal that I am deemed unsuccessful, I truly believe in my heart that there are other things left to explore and other things left that I am truly meant to do, so if I remain closed to only this one idea, I will have lost the ability to explore and to make a difference.

I believe still that these are great traits to have, to be willing to work hard towards something that is very valuable to you in life. However, I now see that my path is not linear. My path is a winding, twisting, moss-covered, beautifully uneven path through a forest like the one pictured above from a camping trip I went on to a beautiful lake.

Changing my character:

As I spoke about in my last post about changing your story, I am also working on changing my character to accommodate those twists and turns, to explore lots of different paths and side roads along the way. I can now see that exploring and becoming an explorer instead of just a linear achiever will serve me so much more on my path and allow me to help others as well.

I am learning to say yes to exploring lots of different opportunities and avenues for the work that I love and different ways that I can help people find their own paths as well. I believe that we all have forces that are either coming from ourselves or others that keeps us in a small world whereas the actual world and reality are limitless! I choose today to explore and see what comes up on my beautiful forest path and I hope you will too.

Update: As a result of becoming more of an explorer I have recently found some opportunities that are more of a match for me and the life I want to live and how I can help others. I will keep you all posted on those!

Questions for you:

  1. What path are you on in life?

2. What changes in your mindset or character can you make to make that path more enjoyable for you?

I’d love to hear from you! You can leave a comment below and I will answer your comments, or you can email me at: info@thecheerychef.com

Lots of love,

Trista

I am adding a donate button on my blog posts now starting with my Dear Universe post. These donations will help me continue to provide great content on a weekly business as well as grow my gluten free baking business. Thank you so much for your generosity!


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Changing Your Story

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Sometimes in life when you start over after a big change you actually have to make more changes to your life. That can be really frightening to do. So often we want to return to comfort, to familiarity, to what we know for sure. However, in the journey of life it is precisely when we want to return to comfort that we must choose a rockier trail. We must choose to do some challenging things, branch out and explore some other paths. This is the only way to growth, both personally, in our community and in our world as a whole. This is where I find myself today. I am really enjoying the creativity of getting back into baking and I have a couple of major events planned that take me way out of my comfort zone. On the other hand, I still feel like I need to “shake things up,” challenge myself in new and different ways, find other income streams in my business and learn to serve others in new and different ways. In this post I’m going to answer my own questions on this journey and I’d love to hear back from you. What changes are you making? How are you changing and editing your own story?


Who do I want to be?

In my life I want to become someone who gives lots of value to the community by sharing my talents and knowledge to benefit others. I want to be of service by working on volunteer projects, teaching workshops and sharing my journey here on the blog as well as in videos so that others may find comfort in the path they are on and share with me and each other. Maybe there is someone I can help with my story so that they don’t feel so alone. I also want to be a financially abundant person so that I can travel with my family and also enjoy all kinds of amazing foods around the world.


What do I want to do & How am I making that happen?

Wow! There are so many things that I want to do. The activities that we do really shape who we are and who we want to become. Not only do I want to bake custom desserts and create works of art with food, I want to help others with goal setting and vision boards and other processes that have helped me. I am accomplishing this by joining TEAM Beaverton, a group for home-based and micro-businesses: https://beaverton.org/bold/teambeaverton/? at the Beaverton Chamber of Commerce and I will be teaching those workshops to others.

I want to be of service by joining the local Rotary Club: https://portal.clubrunner.ca/2431 and helping with their community projects. I am doing this by meeting with the club about membership and joining the club. I am excited to help with all of the projects coming up for the holiday season and beyond.

The other way I am being of service is setting up volunteer work with Feed the Mass. They teach local cooking classes and are a non-profit: https://www.feedthemass.com/ First, I’ll help out with a class, then create some of my own and teach the classes in their downtown Portland location.

I want to become a custom baker and specialize in custom ice cream cakes and meringue desserts and showpieces. I am doing this by practicing each week different ideas that I have, tasting them, giving out samples and posting the photos on social media. I am so thrilled that my first creation got a great response so I know I am on the way.

I also want to use my writing/video skills to create some workshops, online products that will help others and in turn will help me have more income streams in my business.


What value do I want to add to the world?

Both on the path of custom baked goods and with helping others on their journey of growth, change and abundance in business, I want to add the value of positivity and light. There are ups and downs to life and sometimes life’s signals can be very confusing. I want to be open and honest with others, share what I am going through and what I have been through in the past so that they can in turn open up and share too. When we don’t share our stories with the world it is not just us who lose out, it is others because maybe something you share could help someone else going through the same thing.

To start doing this I am committing to regularly publishing blog posts once a week on Monday mornings. Also, very soon I will be starting a 30 day video challenge to share stories and hopefully help others in their journeys.


What legacy do I want to leave?

I want to leave behind lots of information in the form of blogs, videos and more that can help others to not feel alone in their journey, know that they matter, that they have something to contribute and that the world is a richer place because they are sharing their heart.


Who am I in my daily life?

I have embarked on a lot of projects and habit changes as of late because I want to change my story both inside and out.

Neat and Orderly:

In my daily life I want to be someone who is organized, neat and orderly. Because of this I decided I would tackle the garage and make sure that only things that we use are on the shelves, that everything fits on the shelves and is in a spot where it is most accessible. To accomplish this almost every morning for several weeks I have been de-cluttering for at least 15-30 minutes. Most of the time it was in the garage but I also de-cluttered the front closet, my own closet and drawers, kitchen drawers and cabinets and more. Now, the garage is almost finished! It feels good to actually go in there and be able to find things again. Another part of my change to daily life is to get a handle on my enormous ironing pile. Again, I worked on that for a few minutes a day for quite a while and as of yesterday I finally finished ironing over 90 pieces of clothing, tablecloths, etc. Now, my ironing drawer is actually empty! However, de-cluttering and ironing will still be on my daily “watch” list so if there is any to do it goes on my daily schedule to take care of that.

Financial Abundance/Awareness:

Lately I have also committed to staying on top of my accounting and budgeting in my business. It is not something that I really enjoy doing, but I realize I must do this daily so that I am very aware of the numbers and how things are going. It is important to really prioritize what to spend money on in my business, especially right now when I am starting over and resources will be coming in very soon. So, I do a few minutes of money work each morning by checking my business account, entering in receipts/payments, budgeting or prioritizing money to spend on upcoming events. This has really brought me peace of mind because I can be aware daily of the finances of my business. I will become financially abundant by finding more ways to make money in my business.


Exercise Habit:

I am part of a great accountability group on Facebook where we post about the exercise that we do each day. This has been a great help in re-establishing my exercise habits. On days that I either go to the gym or exercise at home on the elliptical are days that I have more focus and energy, so I know it is vital to my journey. I also feel better health-wise when I get regular exercise. I am so grateful to have begun this habit.


Monthly Goals/Projects:

A great friend of mine and I have started working on keeping each other accountable weekly and also sometimes daily for our goals that we set for September, October and November. Once that process wraps up we can set new project goals and perhaps some habit goals. I have 1 goal for each month that is project-based and then 4 habit goals: exercise, de-cluttering, ironing and money work. The exercise and money work will always continue, but the de-cluttering and ironing work as I said before will be a case of “awareness” if they need to be dealt with that day or not. My September goal is to finish the relaunch of my business which is nearly complete. Then, my October goal is to prepare for the Gluten Free Food and Allergy Fest in November. My November goal is to increase my business income. I’m excited to say that I’ve made progress on these 3 goals due to the daily/weekly check ins with my friend!


How does my outside appearance effect my feelings/outlook?

After de-cluttering my clothes this season, I realize that there are certain clothes that just don’t bring me joy. Those are jeans and other types of cotton pants that are not leggings or those types of comfortable pants. I really am more of a formal-dresser than a sporty type, but I always felt like I “should” wear certain things because most people wear them. I could never really find jeans that I really loved to wear no matter what kind they were or how they fit. In that spirit, I have asked for clothes for my birthday so I will be shopping to add to my wardrobe and really change my closet to one that brings me joy through dresses, skirts, leggings and tops I really love. There are still pieces that bring me joy that I now have, so I don’t have to start over completely, I am just becoming more aware of how the clothes make me feel and how I am able to show up in the world because of that.


What changes can I make?

I have already started to make changes by working on getting out into the community more, create more events, work on my custom baking more, becoming a more orderly person and the list goes on. :) However, I believe that change is a very good thing for all of us. I will continue to make changes and I welcome any suggestions on changes I can make for the better. Please comment below with any ideas you may have.

I will be starting my video challenge to get me moving again with sharing more with people, but I welcome other ideas as well.

I focus a lot on giving and charity work which is fantastic and I want to continue to do that, but I also have to focus on making money in my business as well so that I can do more work with my family as well as meet my personal goals of travel, self care and more!

I am learning that it is ok to make money. It is a flow of abundance from me to others and from others to me. I love to give of myself, and I also love to receive. I allow myself to receive abundance from others because I am putting out a lot of value into the world. I am so grateful for what is coming my way! :) One change I can make in this area is to balance my charity work with my money-making work. I am joining forces with community organizations that will help me help others in my area. Then, I can spend my other time working on products and services that provide value that I am paid for.


How can I learn and grow?

I believe that in order to have a wonderful story and to change it, we all need to be constantly learning and growing as human beings. I will continue to seek out books, videos and other materials that stretch my thinking and my actions as well as my spirit. I will also be aware of my self care and my time off. Those are also great parts of learning and growing, giving back to ourselves as well and honoring that we are special too.

I welcome any feedback on this post and would love to hear how you are changing, learning, growing or needing a change in your personal story. I’d love to hear from you! You can comment here, or leave me an email at:

info@thecheerychef.com

With love,

Trista


I am adding a donate button on my blog posts now starting with my Dear Universe post. These donations will help me continue to provide great content on a weekly business as well as grow my gluten free baking business. Thank you so much for your generosity!


Donate